#3: Her blog used to be more about herself. No more on that now.

I browse through her blog up till year 2009. Major difference that I can spotted is her blog used to be cheerful and she used to blog a lot about herself. Now, she didn't do that anymore. Her recent post is more "negative". She kept everything to only herself. Her latest one:     

                                  
                                                       If you happen to find my heart, 

Can you help me to keep it in a safe box,

Safe from others who wants to hurt it badly,

Because if I ever have it back,

I might hand it over to the same person,

Whom I know, he will hurt it over and over again.

I want to be the stranger that she mentioned to keep her heart. Don't know what's playing in her mind. Was she still thinking of her ex? Giving him another chance? I hope she can think wise and never give her ex any chance anymore. Enough with the scars and bruises that she got from the bastard. My wish at here alone is worthless if she didn't work her way forward. I want to see her happy. Enough of the ex.

She did mentioned in one of her post, on her requirement for her bf,

Someone who is mature, stable, caring, and loving - high standards?

Don't think so... Let's see what are the no no characters I won't get attracted to...

I can't take guys with childish character, and thinks he knows everything but just living in a nutshell.

I don't quite admire guys who just live their life each day and not plan for a future.

I don't like guys who mask a lot, it doesn't look good when I find out the person behind it.

I don't like guys who boast about nothing but himself - Hate it when someone is always full of himself...

 I really don't know whether I have any of the traits mentioned. Am I childish, I am sometime. Well I guess all of us will still have the lil kid in us even though we are adults now. Do I plan for my future? I did. Do I mask myself? I did. Depending on the situation. We have to carry certain image in certain function. I am a guy with humours, you won't want me to joke all the way while I'm delivering my speech! 

In short, those are the requirements by all the girls. Of course we want a perfect couple but some find it really difficult to understand why they never meet their prince charming. You will NEVER find your prince charming that tick all the requirements. No on is perfect in this world. 

I always believe Jestina is a really good gf. I am really lucky to have met her. And she is my gf now. Still it is not a intimate relationship between us. There is still something big that pull her back from committing to this relationship. What is the big rock here, I am trying to find out. I always think I might be the big rock myself. If that's the case, I'll be really sad to remove myself from the picture.

I noticed she went to Bkt Cahaya to cycle last time. Now let me google on that. Having the memory back might not be a bad idea after all.

There goes the list for guys that attracts her,

Let me list down some of the ways you can get girls around you, well at least these attracts me...

1. Your killer suit (Suit you put charm on it)
2. Your stylish hairstyle
3. Your killer smile
4. Your skill of sweet talking
5. Your skill in instruments
6. Your personality - Down to earth prince charming
7. Your dance moves
8. Your way of being shy when you get compliments
9. Your way of looking
10. And if you know beat boxing

She told me this before,  fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me

Her huge interest in i have this huge love for German Shepherd

 Extracted from one of her posts,

How is it like to have a boyfriend?
How is it like to hold hands and hug each other while doing simple window shopping?
How is it like when you felt like crying and there is a shoulder for you to rely on?
How is it like when you can openly talk about the sweetest things you both did with everyone?
How is it like to have him mention about you being the most precious without taking into considerations?

 Right now, I am wondering How is it like when you can openly talk about the sweetest things you both did with everyone? I want to get her back to herself normal self so badly. I want to make her feel what is it like to have a bf. She can have my shoulder to cry on whenever she wants to. I want to hug and kiss her everyday. It might be a dream now, but I cherish for it to happen.

I am a sucker for needles lah

I just love horror movies

Jestina, you deserve better than what you are experiencing now.